Paranoia and Parenthood

I never realized how paranoid I was until I became a parent. Its as if you realize that the world is a big, bad place the second the doctor or nurse places that new life in your arms. Everything is a hazard now. You find yourself checking your baby’s breathing two, three, six times in an evening and then laugh sheepishly when you find your spouse in the nursery doing the same exact thing. You triple check the straps and harnesses on the carseat or swing. I find myself taking her barrettes off of her hair before I leave her in the carseat because I am afraid she is going to take them off and choke on them.

Its not an easy feeling to realize that there are so many hazards that this most important little being will come into contact with. I think back to my childhood and the times when I got yelled at by my parents for not calling to check in – at the time I had no idea what the big deal was but now I understand! The phrase/curse, “you will understand when you are a mother one day” stands out in my head and I cannot help but feel a little grumpy at the thought that they were right again!

Sadly, in addition to also having to worry about outside influences or possiblities many of us also wonder about how we, as parents, will affect our children and how they grow up and raise their own children. There is no end to the worries that come with being a mother or a father. These are a few I have heard recently – but I know many of us have a variety of different fears.

“My ultimate fear is that I’ll be a complete failure as a mom. It’s very important for me to raise him differently than how I was raised. I want him to always know that he’s loved and that he doesn’t have to work to get my attention, he’ll get it because he deserves because he’s my son! But I can’t help but be paranoid that I’ll fall into the comfort zone that I KNOW because of how I was raised as a child,”  – Samantha.

 

“I wonder how my husband and I will act as a team. I want to set good examples for Jonathan to follow, I want our families to respect our wishes and “rules” and when they don’t (because I know some of them won’t) – what can we do about it?” - Mimi

 

“I’ve seen great kids come from both good and BAD families and that scares me, because you really never know what you’re gonna get. You can just do your best and hope that you’ve given your child all he/she needs to make it as a “good person” in today’s world, ” – Lauryn

 

“I am most afraid to know that I cannot be there to protect my child 24/7 against all the ills in today’s world. I can only try my best.” – Patricia

 

“I have this irrational fear of someone taking my children from my home in the middle of the night. Kidnappings were widespread in the headlines when I was a kid and now that I am a mom I cannot seem to get them out of my head,” – Liz